Tuesday, May 15, 2012

Dark Castle Review

So. Remember back in the day before most people read gaming magazines and heard if games were good before they bought them? I do. I remember picking out new NES games for my parents to buy me because they looked cool on the box...only to play them and have my child heart broken. I threw game controllers into the wall like it was nobodies business. To bad they don't make them like they used to, simple and indestructible from your anger lol.

Anyways, I never played Dark Castle when I was a kid, but I'm sure if you did...this story will touch home with you...this game is so lame I actually feel bad for wasting everyone's time by writing this review, because I know its just going to make people curious to see how bad it is.

I'm going to make this simple...

                                              


NA Cover Art


Title Screen

Gameplay Screenshot

Chose Level Screenshot


For some unknown reason you have to beat the Black Knight in the Dark Castle. Why? Who knows. The best part yet....wait for it....you are going to do it by throwing rocks at him! 
Did you ever play a game without a plot? This is one of those games. There is no story here, and if there is..its lost in between all the glitches and horrible controls. All you know is you are some dude, with a lot of rocks and that you must make your way to the Black Knight and slay him...with rocks..

Overall Plot Score: 0 out of 10

Want to know something worse than the plot? Gameplay. It's essentially a Donkey Kong style game. Except you can throw rocks and get hit by stuff other than barrels. You have to climb up and down stairs, ladders, ropes in order to finish a level. However...attempting to do this with the most God awful controls is near impossible. Where do I start? Lets start with throwing rocks...you don't just throw them straight, you actually have to use the up and down arrow on the d-pad to aim. God forbid if you have to aim at something coming right at you, because its obvious this guy has a serious form of arthritis in his throwing arm and it takes forever to raise and lower, and getting the proper angle is just as hard. 

I'm not done yet.

So not only does throwing rocks suck, but there are items placed on the ground...or so you think anyways until you try picking it up. How do you pick it up? have fun figuring this out. I want you to have fun working on this. Next is ducking and jumping. Ducking actually serves a purpose, you can duck from odd looking people throwing things at you. Jumping...ok..so not only do you jump like Peter Pan, but a lot of places the game makes you jump at..is retarded. For instance - in one of the first levels, there is a microscopic step down on the floor...like literally if you were 94 with a walker you would just roll over this step down and be on your way. Well..not our trusty "hero", if you walk over this millimeter step down you fall and become dazed in order for your enemies to throw stuff at you and kill you. You must Peter Pan your way over this step.

Also if you are on the ladder or a step and a rat or a bat or something goes by...even if your not on the same level, or really near it...you will still get hit by it. You can't throw rocks from ladders..or even stairs..your a sitting duck. Enjoy this one guys.

Overall Gameplay Score: 0 out of 10

Believe it or not...this is the only bright spot for the game. The graphics...aren't great...but they aren't as horrible as the rest of this game is. Graphically it reminds me of  an early Kings Quest game meets Hugo (the old dos games). Still though, these mediocre graphics don't make this any easier to play.

Overall Graphics Score: 5 out of 10

I don't care how good a song or certain game music is. When It's the only music in the game and just repeats itself over and over. You will want to kill yourself. Thank God for mute buttons. Toccata Fugue in D Minor is a great classical piece..just not here..on repeat..with this horrible game.

Overall Music Score: 1 out of 10 


1.5 out of 10


 Final Thoughts. This game is so bad..I kind of recommend you try it for yourself. I dare you to beat it. Anyone into S&M may enjoy the experience. If your not a Genesis collector though, and someone ever tells you this game is worth spending your hard earned money on. Slap them in the face. Until next time ladies and gents...take care and I hope this was informative.


Monday, May 14, 2012

Awesome Find of the Week!

So, sorry for the slowness at putting up posts. It's been very hectic at work, had a record mothers day weekend. Great since that puts more money into my pocket, but I've been pretty beat. Went to see the Avengers last night as a nice treat for being so busy...and I must say..it was Epic. Epic. Epic! Anywhos...so I already own 1 model 1 and 2 model 2's...so why not pick up a 3rd model 2!? I don't mind when its boxed and the box looks like it warped off of the shelf in 1991 lol.

I already have the model 2 box with sonic 2, now I have the Lion King boxed :P huzzah...


So I tried playing Dark Castle so I can write a review on it...and...well...I will be writing a review soon...but..It's going to be hard...since it is so horrible...lol

Monday, May 7, 2012

Collecting Milestone!

Hey guys, pretty stoked...today I officially hit the 100 game milestone in my Genesis collection!


Nothing spectacular - all pretty common games - but boy do I love complete games..especially when they look virtually untouched and with the top retail tabs on them! Yes Frogger is in the cardboard case..but..I will take it.


                                             Frogger, Columns, Fung and Games, Pac-Attack


Oh, oh, oh! whats better than complete games? Yeah, thats right. Complete games with posters!!!

I'm so happy I reached this milestone of 100, but I still have a long journey ahead to a completed collection. So thanks to everyone who has been following and to those who suppose my classic gaming habits !

Sunday, May 6, 2012

Streets of Rage 2 Review and Then Some!

Hey guys, sorry about the short disappearing act. Here is my review on another classic, Streets of Rage 2! Also known outside the U.S. as Bare Knuckle - which if you pay attention to the arcade machines in the game that you destroy in the first stage..says Bare Knuckle! Little tid-bit of info for ya's. Also I've been contemplating modding my genesis with an S-Video input and Overclocking the system. More of that though after the review.


Title: Streets of Rage 2
Platform: Sega Genesis
Release Date: December 20, 1992 (North America)
Developer: Sega (AM7)
Publisher: Sega





North American Box Art



Title Screen



Gameplay Screenshot 








      A year has passed since the events of Streets of Rage. To celebrate the defeat of the mysterious "Mr. X" and his syndicate the previous year, Adam Hunter, Axel Stone, and Blaze Fielding met at their favorite nightspot in the city and spent their time reminiscing about their vigilante crusade against "Mr. X" and his organization. Axel and Blaze had moved out of the city after the adventure from last year. Axel has begun working as a part-time bodyguard and Blaze teaches dance classes. Adam has since rejoined the police force and lives in a small house with his younger brother.

    The next morning, Axel received a phone call from Eddie 'Skate' Hunter, Adam's younger brother. Skate had arrived at home from school and was shocked to find his house in ruin and his older brother missing. Attached to the front door was a picture of Adam chained to a wall at the feet of Mr. X. The criminals began to retake the streets once more. Beatings and lootings took place regularly and in broad daylight. Chaos reigned in the city, far worse than before.
     Realizing that "Mr.X" and his syndicate has returned for revenge against him, Skate and Axel waste no time in telling Blaze about the unexpected situation and Blaze herself is determined to help Axel out in defeating "Mr. X" and rescuing Adam. Accompanied by Adam's young brother Skate and Axel's "friend," a professional wrestler named Max Thunder, Axel and Blaze set forth on a rescue mission, which will take them from the city all the way to "Mr. X"'s hideout on a desolate island.  -  As per Wikipedia.org

                                                   


So plot...whats to say about it? This isn't an RPG as I stated with my prior review of World of Illusion. Don't expect anything to intense...but overall it is a little deeper than your average beat 'em up from this time period. Sega actually gave the characters back stories and works them into the overall plot fairly well. Nothing original, but it gives you a reason to beat the crap out of the bad guys! I've played plenty of games in my time, and even some newer ones, where I have to stop and say to myself, "Why am I doing this again?" Streets of Rage 2 is not one of these games. Enjoy it for what it's worth, technically if this game didn't have a story and was just beating people senseless for no reason...it would still be mad fun!

Overall Plot Score: 8 out of 10



What is there to say about the gameplay that the game doesn't say for itself? It's awesome, beat 'em up action at it's finest my friends. Even with only simple punches, kicks, and the must have special attacks, it's fun and part of the charm of the game. Simple isn't always good, but, it fits SoR2 very nicely. I think complex combo's would of detracted from the fast paced punching and kicking. The gameplay is fast paced and has friendly fire, so be careful. It's easy to knock out whoever your playing with if not careful. The ability to pick up dropped weapons the enemies drop is great to and adds an extra oomph to combat. Another thing SoR2 does well is scale difficulty depending on how many players there are and on your choice of difficulty. Easy, medium, hard are your options. When playing on higher difficulties, enemies have more HP and are tougher to bring down as they can break your button smashing and knock you out or toss you across the screen. When playing with friends you will have more enemies on screen. You won't buy this game for the story, but you will keep coming back for the gameplay!

Overall Gameplay Score: 10 out of 10



The graphics are pretty standard 16-bit fanfare. Nothing groundbreaking for it's time, but still pretty good. A lot of games from this era have very hard to read text and and details can be badly pixelated.  You can read enemy names and see the details on their faces and clothing pretty well. A lot of the enemies are pretty well done and are fun to beat up. There isn't any hang up or lag time like in some of the Genesis games that are fast paced or have a lot of stuff going on screen at once. 

Overall Graphics Score: 8 out of 10


Okay, so Streets of Rage has in my opinion, one of the best sound tracks of all time. Not just 2, but through the entire series. The music is pretty fitting, I remember bobbing my head often as a kid playing this game...nothing has changed. It sports a 80's style techno, hip hop style soundtrack. One of the only games I liked with a better soundtrack is Jet Set Radio on Dreamcast. Another feature that will keep you coming back. Beating the tar out of baddies while jamming to sweet tunes...it doesn't get much better. 

Overall Music Score: 10 out of 10


9 out of 10

Overall the entire Streets of Rage series is a must play for any Genesis owner and Sega fan. Streets of Rage 2 is my favorite in the series. If you want a fast paced brawler that you can put down in an hour or so, then this game will entertain you the entire time



Okay, so now that we have the review out of the way. Just a quick note that I'm working on modding one of my many Genesis units. I plan on overclocking the unit and should be able to boost its speed by 20-30% which will take care of the lag felt in some games like Sonic when you get nailed and loose all your coins.

Also I will be attempting to mod it with an S-Video hookup which should give much more clarity to the graphics on screen. I will have an update on when I'm starting this project of mine hopefully soon. Until then, take care!